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Saturday 4 May 2013

Understand the Issues Related to Dating by the Couple Whose Marriage is Fixed

Dating culture was not generally known to Indians, especially the south Indians up in the nineties and some years beyond. Though, it was happening in the higher strata of society and among the rich, they too maintained a low profile about it. The lower and middle class families, never encouraged dating before the marriage and were hesitant to encourage it even after the fixing of the marriage date.

During the later part of the nineties, the introduction of the Internet and high bandwidth leased lines has enabled the entry of foreign BPO and software companies. Such companies, while increasing the job opportunities and offering a higher level of pay and perks to the deserving job seekers , also have brought in changes in the outlook of the society. The society that was up till then discouraging women from attending shift duties and night duties, started allowing them to join such organisations, in order  to become breadwinners and independent wage earners.

Presently, there is a change in the outlook of the parents. Some of them even encourage their wards, whose marriages are fixed or engaged, to go out with the partner if there are a couple of months left before the actual marriage date. Such an arrangement, enables the couple to look back their romance period after the marriage. The question that normally arise in the mind of parents or the couple is about the proximity to be maintained between the couple during such dating, and whether to allow any extra freedom for the engaged couple. While such questions are continuously debated, the dating has  steadily gained momentum and become more prevalent.

Such courtship or dating also has some positive aspects. It allows the couple to know each other more intimately and enables them to have a concrete idea about their life partner. It is advisable for the couple to open up slowly and allow the relationship to blossom naturally.

Dating before marriage also presents the lurking danger about misunderstanding each other. One should be careful in the exchange words and never give room for ambiguity and possible misreading of an expression. Exercise more care, while making comments with those who are reserved or those who feel very much excited. Balance your thoughts and try to stride an easy approach that increases the pleasure and reduce discomfort.

It is your exclusive right, to open up or leave the discussion on your past relationships if you had any. Most of the couple, would prefer to forget and put aside such events, instead of precipitating. It is essential for the dating couple to use their common sense in deciding what to disclose and what not to disclose. They must try to use the opportunity to understand the plus and minus points of the partner to adjust and lead a happy life.