Friday, 22 February 2013

Young People Should Know & Discuss Their Marriage Preferences Before Accepting to Marry

A marriage will become  a success, only, when both the partners understand and accept the other as they are. It is essential for a man or woman, to know his or her marriage priorities and preferences about their life partner. Making a wrong choice in the selection of a life partner, will make the life of the couple miserable.

The frustration about the choice of a wrong life partner, often surfaces among couples who underwent arranged marriages, bowing to family pressure. Though, most of the present day generation, is categorical about their marriage preferences and expectations about their life partner,  some of them,  failed to understand their own preferences or express their choice and yield to family pressure.

For instance,  a woman with high expectations regarding her life partner's qualification and earning capability,  when married to someone with a different qualification or lesser qualification and earning, will feel betrayed. She will feel frustrated and such frustration will reflect on  her family life. Her husband,  who is innocent and unaware of her preferences, will be at the receiving end for no fault of his. Similar will be the mindset of a man with high expectations, when married to some woman, who does not match his expectations. In this case it's his wife who is innocent, will be at the receiving end.

It is found that people who suffer such frustrations, will not talk about it  in the initial years, but, only show it off in their actions after some years,  affecting the partner. The partner, will bear the brunt and suffer silently, without knowing the real cause. When the reason for such frustrations is revealed after a few years, it causes mental trauma to both of them and reflect on their family life. 
Marriage counselors ,who deal with such couples, will always suggest them to find the best in their life partner, instead of brooding over the missing portion. They will suggest them, to look into only the positive aspects of their life partner. While most of them will learn the art for the sake of keeping their marriage intact, some of them will refuse and head for a split.


It is essential for the young people, who are willing to undergo an arranged marriage, to discuss their life partner preferences, with their parent or guardian. They should not get succumbed to external pressures ,to compromise on their marriage aspirations. In case, they fail to convince their parents and put to undergo such a marriage, they must learn not reflect it in the married life, thus making the innocent partner a victim of no fault.